TPS Report: TGIF

I realize how slobbish I am when I am at work – self-consious that my colleagues turn away from my desk in disgust. When you pretty much live at your desk, habits are revealed, you get lazy in your own routine and bottom line, you get comfortable and think no one is looking.

My worst habit is putting food on documents I am working on. Although I have enough sense not to put lasagna, curry rice or other “wet foods” on papers, I find myself pushing the limits. Nuts and dried fruit are no problen – casually strewn across TPS [sic] reports without a concern. These foods hardly leave a trace and do not reveal any slobbish behaviors.

But perhaps the most embarrassing foods are fried and oily – namely potato chips, fried flourish snacks like Japanese “karintou” and cookies, that you think you can get away with. But not only do these foods leave a big splotchy, translucent mess on the confidential files that the client gave you that morning, but you are left making a ruckus dusting off the crumbs that ultimately don’t make it into the garbage can even though you strategically bend the stack of papers and tap lightly. So your slovenliness is apparent on the papers you were grazing off of (which can be put away) AND all over the floor that surrounds you (which can’t).

I recently tested the limits when some sweet, saintly soul placed bite-sized pieces of green tea cheese cake by the coffee maker. There was a gram-cracker crust cradling this pale green piece of heaven which was quite effective in preventing total saturation. Still, there were traces left on the papers – like smeared creamy, green boogers.

But then again, when there’s cheese cake involved –
F*** TPS reports.
Long live creamy, green boogers.

Advertisements

2 Responses to “TPS Report: TGIF”

  1. kayoko Says:

    omg dying. so happens to me all the time. like the worst messes are made on the most important papers. contracts. confidential agreements.

    weren’t we supposed to get rid of paper in this digital age?

    yes, long live green boogers and splotchy messes!

  2. kayoko Says:

    omg dying. so happens to me all the time. like the worst messes are made on the most important papers. contracts. confidential agreements.

    weren’t we supposed to get rid of paper in this digital age?

    yes, long live green boogers and splotchy messes!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: